Conifer Fowl: Sister of a Criminal Mastermind
by sixth sence
Summary: Conifer Fowl (Artist genius and surprisingly good at pysical situations) is sister to Artemis Fowl (Criminal master mind Juvinille genius). Every is peaceful for a few years, and then suddenly everyone is out to get them!


I loved being Artemis' sister. It was because of him I knew fairies existed, and I knew they weren't the prancy, dancey "I'm wearing a flower dress" fairies. these fairies were armed and dangerous. When you winded them up, that is. of course, I never really belived stereo types, so when Artemis introduced me to Holly when I was three, you can imagine how pleased I felt. I had been doing things with them for seven years before my first crisis came up. And it included a certain power-crazed pixies daughter.

It all started with a phone call from holly, with me in the room. "Artemis?" she asked "holly" replied Artemis. "I need you below ground now" she said. "why?" asked my brother. "we haven't had a crisis in seven years!" "I'll give you two surnames, then tell me if you'll come, would you like to what they are?" "Go on," said Artemis uneasily. "Koboi and Spiro" said holly. I jumped to attention. Koboi was dead! And Artemis is the only one that worked with fairies! The two put together could cost lives, human and fairy! Artemis obviously realised this to. "Get the next shuttle in Tara ASAP. We'll be there." I felt something I knew Artemis was feeling to, electricity. It was the beginning of something, we both knew it.

When we were on the shuttle in Tara, me, Artemis and butler, all I could do was wonder what could be going on. If koboi was dead and Spiro was demented and in prison, how could the two be working together? When we got there, my question was answered. "What's going on?" asked Artemis immediately. Foaly didn't even complain about his lack of a greeting. "It's not opal" said the centaur. "Hang on," I butted in. "koboi was an only child and never got married!" ", Does that deny her the right to adopt? No. Who you see on the screen there is ruby koboi, do you recognise the mud man?" of course we did. It was Jon Spiro to the top most hair on his head. "This isn't good" muttered me and Artemis in perfect unison. Artemis looked surprized for a moment, and then let it pass. "Okay, so, what do we do?" "First," said holly, entering the room "According to the fairy book she is forced to move her rivalry to the next oldest in the family meaning-" "me" I finished. "Conifer?" said Artemis, as though he himself would much rather be in the limelight. "But she's too-" "I AM NOT TO YOUNG!" I shouted "I'm one year younger, one year, than you were when you started all this, I am not backing out!" Artemis sighed. "Very well, we'd better start figuring out what to do then," I smiled. w it. Back at Fowl manor, Artemis went to his study to meditate; I went to mine to sketch. Everyone had their own way to come up with plans, this was mine. I sketched the new pixie, ruby koboi, only with fangs. I had a small habit of drawing depressing things, this was quite cheerful compared to the normal sketch with me. (I'll save you the depression of details.) It was mine and Artemis' plans mixed that we settled on. After that, we went back down to haven, feeling glad I managed to persuade Myles and Beckett to stay.

On arriving, the rioting and fights weren't half as bad as I knew they would get. Koboi and Spiro were in the middle of it all, smiling at the scene unfolding before their eyes they then noticed us. We walked up to them. "So!" spat koboi, looking at us. "The rescue team decided to join us," I was looking at Spiro, no signs of the Mesmer; he knew what was happening and was working with koboi willingly. "I'll spare you my lectures." she continued. I was then shot in the chest and knocked un-conscience.

I woke up, but didn't open my eyes. I wanted to see what condition I was in before koboi and Spiro knew I was awake. I was tied to I chair, but other than that in 100% condition. Not that I thought I would stay that way. I opened my eyes to find myself in a place Artemis had described to me many time. We were in the spiro needle. Spiro was the only one in the room other than me, Artemis and holly. I guessed koboi wasn't here as to keep an eye below ground, and they were keeping butler in a separate room to make space. Artemis and holly were already awake. Why was it I was always the last to wake up? Spiro noticed I had. "so," he said, turning to face us. "We're all awake then." "What is it you want?" asked Artemis, a little frustrated. "Want?" scoffed Spiro "I thought you were supposed to be a genius. Is it not obvious? I want revenge, fowl, revenge on you and your family, and I'll start with your sister there, ickle Connie," I scowled. "Don't call me Connie," I spat, eyeing him with an expression of deepest loathing. He laughed. "So your about to be tortured, then killed, all you care about is what I call you!" I arched an eyebrow, reminding even myself of Artemis. "You think it will be torture, to me it will be bliss." I then realised what I was saying. "I really shouldn't have said that " Spiro smiled a menacing smile. "That trick doesn't fool me," he said.

"take the elf to a cell, little arty can watch ickle Connie get tortured." said Spiro, a twisted smile playing on his lips. "Considering our last encounter, "little arty" hardly fits the description," said Artemis. "And as for calling me Connie..." I threatened. "Artemis, you're as bad as your sister, she is about to be killed and all you can think about is your name." said Spiro, his expression turning immediately to serious. "This isn't one of your games, fowl, that pixie is five times smarter than you, there will be no elf dancing in at last minute to save your hide, your intellect on its own won't save your butt, He didn't count on one thing. I was more than just clever...

Me and Artemis were both knocked un-conscious again and when I woke up I was tied to a platform. I was again the last to wake up (seriously!) Spiro looked at me and the twisted smile was again showing on his face. "I think it's only fair to know what you're about to be facing, that is a wall of fire, someone get me some matches." he had them within five seconds. he lit my platform. The flames engulfed me. I had to wait until I couldn't see Spiro through the flames, because that meant he couldn't see me. I then had to do a knot pinch Holly taught me to untie even the most complicated knots. I pinched it with my index and middle finger. I then pointed them towards my hand, I felt the knot come undone. I then ran off the platform, away from my brother and his enemy. In front of me was something I had not counted on. "D'arvit" I said, as ruby koboi drew her gun...

"D'arvit is an understatement this this situation," said koboi, an evil smile on her face. I didn't say anything, instead slapped her, pushed out of the way, stole her gun and kept running. I had to get to the room next to the one I was just in to get butler. I entered the room and saw butler sitting on a chair and two un-conscious men on the floor. "About time" he said

We ran to the bottom floor, where the cells were. One floor down, I heard shouting.

"WHERE IS SHE, FOWL?"

"I don't know,"

"YES YOU DO! TELL ME!"

"I honestly have no idea,"

I moved on before I heard any more.

We met to guards a floor above holly's cell. I shot them both square in the chest.

"You're a little better than Artemis in physical situations" said butler

"A little?" I replied

We reached holly's cell. "Good work," said holly. I took out two hair pins and began picking the lock. "Koboi's in the building," I told them. "But she's unarmed" I held up the neutrino 2000. "She is seriously out of date" muttered holly. "We still have to proceed with caution," said butler. "We're on to stage 3." I said, "Get Artemis"

We ran back up the stairs, but started creeping on the floor below Artemis.

"WHERE IS SHE FOWL?"

"I already said, I don't know,"

"SHE IS YOUR SISTER, YOU HAVE TO KNOW!"

"In that case, where is your brother?"

"DON'T GET SMART WITH ME FOWL, JUST TELL ME WHERE SHE IS!"

The shouting got louder as we went up. (FOWL!) When we got outside the door my ear drums nearly burst. "Okay," whispered butler "Conifer, when I open the door shoot Spiro, immediately." he then opened the door, I then shot, Spiro was then knocked un-conscious. I stayed where I was, koboi ran forwards...

"You!" said Ruby, her red hair swinging around her like a cloak.

"Me!" I said, smirking. We were armed, she wasn't. So all at the same time, we shot her. She landed next to Spiro. I went over to Artemis and started un-tying him. "We should phone the human police about Spiro," I said "The LEP can't do anything about him. We can say he kidnapped a "poor, innocent, little girl."" I said.

"Good idea," said Artemis. Holly took Ruby below ground and the human police arrived.

"Can I take your names, please?" asked the constable.

"I am Peter Manning" said butler.

"and you, young man?" Enquired the constable.

"Luke Manning" said Artemis

"And you, little missus?" the constable asked

"Juliet Manning" I said, saying the first name that came to mind.

Back at Fowl manor, I sat back in my study. It was over. We had won. I replayed the whole situation in my head. All of a sudden I realised something. Koboi had a scar above her right eye that she didn't have in the camera footage, and didn't Spiro have a brother? The truth hit me hard.

"Hello," Said a cold, female, pixie voice from behind me...

I put down the sketch book in my hands.

"Hello" repeated ruby Koboi. I slowly turned around.

"I thought as much, would you mind telling who we arrested?" I said calmly.

"I had a sister in the orphanage, mum didn't take her. "She said

She shot. I ducked. The neutrino blast burned through my chair.

"A little faster than Artemis then." I smiled

"A little?" I asked. She frowned.

"Don' get smart with me Fowl," she said. I restrained a giggle. This pixie was more like Spiro than she thought. At that moment, Butler ran into the room, wielding this sig saucer. Holly followed neutrino 5000 at hand.

"Don't move, pixie" said butler.

"B-but I s-s-soundproofed the d-d-door!" she said.

"You didn't shut down technology," said Holly, nodding to the carefully placed sketch book I put down earlier. It was right on top of the button with a link to Artemis' study. He had heard the whole thing. I yanked the gun out of her hand and joined butler and Holly...

"Idiots!" laughed Koboi, "Don't you think my mother was smart enough to leave something behind, in case it all went wrong! That thing was me!" she held up her left hand to reveal a black rune on her palm. "An imprint of dark magic," I said, not really wanting to know what it can do. Immediately, it turned blood red. All of a sudden, every part of me ached. I fought it, but not for long. I dropped to my knees, then down on all fours. Holly and Butler didn't even wait for the next part, instead they both shot the damned pixie and she was knocked un-concise. She had a split second to do the same to me. She did...

I woke up in my own bed in my own bedroom, on my own bed. Artemis was pacing the room, holly was sitting on the end of my bed, Juliet was sitting on an arm chair and butler was standing by the door. Artemis was the first to notice me. "How could I have been so- CONIFER?" He said and ran over to me, for once, all intellect and reputation forgotten. "Hey, Arty," I said, it was sore to speak. At that moment, a very smart centaur entered the room. "Hello, conifer" He said. "Feeling any better?" "It hurts to move or speak, but other than that I'm fine," I said. "Well you had better not speak or move then," said Holly, "I can't risk healing you, it might make it worse." "How is she going to communicate then?" asked Artemis. "With this," said Foaly, holding up a black elastic band. "It doesn't hurt to think, so just think what you want to say, and we'll hear it." I would have smiled, had it not hurt. "Let me," said holly, and put it on like a hair band. "Thanks," I thought. "You're welcome said Foaly. "So, do you have Koboi?" I asked. "Err, well-" "What happened?" I asked. Butler spoke this time.

"Well, you fell un-conscious, holly and I went over to you, forgetting the pixie, she got up and ran like mad, quite the escape." All of a sudden I had a thought. "I know how to deal with Spiro, we can drive him mad, We'll just need a really small car." "I can make that happen," smiled Juliet...

The leader's lair.

Everything was going according to plan. Well, Maybe the pixie/ fowl manor was a little off, but the nothing the pixie couldn't handle. One thing was for sure. He was going to show the world he meant business.

Outside the Spiro needle

Artemis was leaning against the White Volkswagen Beetle, as though waiting for someone on the other side of the road. The entire recon squad shielding nearby. I was in the back seat, sitting in the foot well, out of sight.(My dark magic pains forgotten, but a worryingly large bruise on my back) mulch in the front foot well. Spiro began to walk down the road, right on Que. He spotted Artemis.

"Fowl! What do you think you're doing here!" he yelled. Artemis pretended to only notice him.

"Oh, come on!" he said. "How much bad luck can one seventeen year old get!" Spiro ran towards Artemis, Mulch stepped out of the car. "I wouldn't advise anything…" he said. Holly unshielded, in the place mulch was previously, and winked at me.

Why, you…" started Spiro. Holly stepped out. "Hello Artemis, having trouble?"

"Nothing too bad, "said Artemis. Chix Verbal stopped shielding.

"What the-" said Spiro, slightly confused. A recon officer that I had never seen before stopped shielding. So it went on, person after person, until the entire if recon was out there. Then it was my turn.

"Hi Artemis," I said. Spiro Screamed.

"B-b-but," he stammered. "B-but sh-she s-said you w-w-were d-d-dead!" he said. I decided to play along.

"Who said I wasn't?" I said. Spiro fainted.

The leader's lair

"Oh great," Thought Ark Sool. "They have Spiro and are one step away from getting Koboi...

He was right about Spiro, wrong about Koboi...

Outside The Spiro Needle

I walked up to Spiro and checked behind his ears, no scars. I ran my finger along the back. No makeup, this was the real Spiro.

"It's Spiro!" I announced. Everyone let out the breath they had been holding in. All of a sudden, Artemis' phone rang. He looked at it and immediately answered.

"Minerva?" He said.

"Artemis, where are you?" she asked. I found it hard to believe they were once enemies.

"Are you sure you want to know?" He asked.

"No, I don't. call me when the crisis is over." She replied.

"OK" said Artemis. He hung up the phone.

"Well, "he said. "Best get on to phase two."

We were no closer to faze two than we were to inventing self-shooting guns.

"This is hopeless!" admitted Artemis after about seven hours of attempting to plot.

"I know what you mean" I thought, as my dark magic pains were back. Holly entered the room.

"Got anything?" she asked.

"No, wait, what if..." I said...

We took the next shuttle down to haven.

"Oh, look what the cat dragged in. Come to have another go have we?" Smiled Opal. I, holly and butler drew our guns.

"Ha!" Said Koboi. She clicked her fingers and Holly and my guns went flying towards her. But butler's was made of something different. He held it and shot her.

"Well, that avoids the hard part," I said. Two darts were then shot. One to me, one to Artemis...

I woke up in a dark room. As my eyes adjusted to the light, I saw Artemis in a chair next to me, already awake. (Honestly!) And a Gnome in an old commander suit. I couldn't believe my eyes. It was Ark Sool sitting in the corner, leaning over a computer. He spotted me.

"So, we're all awake are we?" asked Sool. I suppressed a giggle. Why was it all the bad guys were alike?

"So, it was you. Too proud to get your hands dirty." I said. "What do you want, Sool?" He frowned.

"Don't get smart with me fowl." he said. I burst out laughing inside my head, glad I wasn't wearing the hairband.

"You think it's funny?" Said Sool and I realised,

I was wearing the hair band.

"Oh, no, It's not like I just burst out laughing or anything, no…" Sool scowled.

"Don't get smart with me Fowl." Sneered Sool. I flicked my hair in such a way that the hair band slipped off unnoticed. I decided to get smart with him.

"What do you want?" I asked, hoping for a Spiro reply.

"Want?" scoffed Sool. "And they say you're a genius. I want revenge fowl, revenge on you and your family." I saw Artemis Hold back a fit of giggles...

Thank frond Sool didn't notice it. His phone went off.

"Hello?" he said. "Oh gods, what!? I'll be there in two minutes." and with that he ran out of the room.

"He's gone to see what we do when he's not in the room. See if he has an excuse to kill us on the spot" I said.

Artemis looked mildly surprised. "You're getting as good as me" smiled Artemis.

Sool looked mildly surprised. "You getting as good as Me." he thought...

"Well, I don't plan on giving him an excuse." Said Artemis.

"Nor do I, however..." I slid my hands on to the seat of the chair next to me and wrapped my fingers around the hairband. I aimed at the camera and threw. I landed perfectly, covering the camera lens. I did my knot pinch and began untying Artemis.

"Good aim," he said.

"I try" I replied. Sool was idiot enough to leave our stuff on the table in the room.

"I wouldn't touch any of that. More than likely a trap." Said Artemis. I nodded. It made sense. We ran. I knocked out a couple of guards on the way and one had an Omni-tool.

"For the door." I said. We continued running. We reached the door and I opened it. In haven, nobody but the LEP knew anything was wrong. With Koboi and Spiro in jail, the streets were as peaceful as haven got when two mud people were running towards police plaza. They knew us though, we were well known. We reached police plaza. I ran to the commander's office to find Trouble Kelp un-conscious on the floor, and Billy Kong sitting on his desk.

"Oh hello," he said...

"Billy Kong," breathed me and Artemis in perfect unison.

"Back to settle old scores fowl, you took that demon from me, and I think I'll have it back." Said Kong.

"Sorry," I said. "You think we're still in possession of him? And he's a he, not an it." I said.

"You're pulling my leg. You have him, he's too valuable to set free," Said Billy, a sneer on his face.

"Sometimes it's not about the money," said Artemis. At those words, Trouble Kelp sat up and shot Billy Kong.

"Whatever you have for me." He said. "It better be good."

"Don't worry," I replied. "It is."

After we told him what happened, he nodded.

"Not good, "he said.

"You're telling us?" I said. Then I remembered something. "Where are Holly and Butler?"

"Up to their necks in wild fire in the back yard f Fowl manor. Don't worry, your family have no idea it's there,"

"OH CRAP!" I said. Trouble looked at me, but Artemis realised what was frightening me.

"D'arvit!" He said.

"What?" asked Trouble.

"Beckett's weekly tree climb is today! He'll be out there any moment!" I said With that me and Artemis ran out of the room and jumped on a shuttle, glad I knew how to drive.

Fowl Manor

Beckett left Fowl Manor, expecting to see the usual peaceful garden, but what he saw was very different. I t was practically a war, and he was right in the middle of it...

Me and Artemis ran up the path, though the house, and out in the back garden (Leaving our parents slightly winded). Beckett was out picking his nose in the middle of the fire fight. I ran towards him. All of a sudden, he was shot by a dart. Lunged forward and picked him up gently. I looked around to see who did it. I saw butler holing a dart gun, without any sun glasses on. I handed Beckett to Artemis.

"Get inside now." I said. I'll be back. Artemis nodded. He knew better than to argue in the middle of a gun fight. he turned around and ran towards the house. I followed, but to do one thing.

I needed to get Juliet.

"So," Said Juliet once I finished explaining. "You're saying Butler got mesmerised to kill us?"

"That's what I think, but he has a strong mind so he managed to resist "killing" instead capturing." I said.

"So you need weaponry, "Smiled Juliet.

"Just for Butler, the rest should be easy." I replied.

"I'll see what I can do," said Juliet.

I ran into the garden and the fire fight was twice as bad as I had last seen it. I didn't hesitate. I shot butler. It was a Neutrino, so it should only knock him out. He was instantly out. Perfect. I dropped the gun and ran forward. I punched and kicked (Not like a child throwing tantrum, but like a professional.) until they were all lying, groaning on the ground. At least, I thought it was everyone...

"Bravo, Miss Fowl. You've been doing well until now." Said Ark Sool.

"Ah, Mr Sool, would you mind telling me what you have against Artemis and myself?" I said, staring right in front of me, to avoid mesmerisation. I reached into my jacket and took out my sunglasses.

"I would advise you to turn around, miss fowl, as you are not talking to ark Sool." Said a voice that belonged to none other than my brother. I knew what was going on. They had used memory Latex to make them sound like Artemis and used one of those masks to make them look like him. I played along.

"Artemis?" I said whipping around quickly.

"And the penny drops. Congratulations Conifer, you are officially the intelligence of a goblin." Said the Artemis/ Sool. I knew it wasn't Artemis, he would never use phrases like that.

"Artemis, why?" I said, trying hard not to say Sool.

"Why" Scoffed Artemis. "You've been taking credit for my plots! You've been taking my place as Mother ndd Father's favourite! I want my role back!" seeing Sool impersonate Artemis was painful. I made him stop.

"Sool, you're not fooling anyone. Artemis isn't like that anymore. "I said, and kicked him right where it hurts.

"A-little- faster-than-Artemis-then," gasped Sool, Falling to the ground. I giggled, and then laughed. It lasted a short while then; I cuffed the unpleasant gnome and called Holly.

I loved it. Ever since Sool was thrown in prison, I could finally Hang out with the people I loved, and the people who didn't want to kill me. I didn't think it was my last crisis, I just decided to enjoy the peace while it lasted...

I hope you all enjoyed it!


End file.
